MUMBAI: The social media rant-master, the former singer - now with a voice to complain - and the most "patriotic" ex-celebrity (according to UNESCO), Abhijeet Bhattacharya has finally ran out of counterparts, incidents, countries, leaders, animals, planets and ideas to rant about. But no reason to rejoice, the controversial singer has managed to find a new target – Abhijeet Bhattacharya.

The musician’s latest tweet read, “What am I doing in life? I do not even have anyone or anything to complain about?” One of the three hardcore Bhattacharya fans commented, “Sir, target those who oppose demonetization na.” Bhattacharya was seen tweeting from one of the queues outside a bank in Bandra. The tweets continued – “I think I should give up on tweeting. Shah Rukh, Salman or Aamir haven’t bothered to reply me and give me publicity. Even ZEE News has stopped calling me to their debates. A few years ago, I lost my voice in Bollywood, now I am losing my voice on social media.” Bhattacharya did not look much bothered in the queue, however, he did not forget to end his every tweet with a sad, crying emoticon.

Making the most of the situation, Bhattacharya started singing out his classics from ‘Phir Bhi Dil Hai Hindustani’. That frustrated the crowd even more, but Bhattacharya defended the action by saying, “I do not see such a turnout to my shows, so I might as well perform here.”

Upon asked whether he stood there to withdraw or deposit the money, Bhattacharya replied, “Oh no no, I am not withdrawing any money or deposit it. I have not earned for some time now. I am just standing to show support to the people and the government.”

After learning that the singer stood in the queue for political gimmick, the crowd asked him to leave and not waste their time. The singer replied, “Shut you, anti-national. Why don’t you withdraw from a Pakistani ATM?” The frustrated crowd now looked confused too.

[Disclaimer: This is a piece of satire. None of the statements quoted is official. The conjectures contained in this piece are a figment of the writer's imagination. Given what transpires on Twitter however, the reality may not be too far from imagination.]